The tyrant of iron and blood, the bulwark of Eastern Europe, the savior of the Soviet Union, the master of Constantinople, the liberator of the Third Rome, the new tsar of the north, the nightmare of Chechnya, the meat grinder of the free world, and the leader of the red regime, General Secretary Gennady Ivanovich Yanaev.

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"Your Majesty, some people think you unified Europe simply by luck. What's your response?" The newly crowned European emperor said indignantly, "They don't understand Napoleon at all. If it weren't for me, who knows how many emperors and kings there would be in Europe. It was I who saved the people of Europe!"