第1章 开局就要嘎了

The start is about to start

[The entire court is delighted + everyone is pampering her to the skies + a joyful occasion] She's transmigrated into a book. Luckily, she's got a system that grants her lucrative quest rewards. Unfortunately, it's a rigged system. Which emperor would want to be ridden like a horse, which courtier would want to wear women's clothing, and which prince would want to be spanked? Even more tragically, she's at the very scene of the rebel assassination attempt, about to be thrown out as bait. Yuan Ruan fumed. But what can she do about being a baby? She can just lie down and drink a bowl of Meng Po soup. [Alas, only a cup of tea left before she's thrown out as bait! So frustrating.] Unexpectedly, the emperor dodged a fatal blow. The accompanying general bravely rescued her and presented her to the emperor. Yuan Ruan's eyes lit up: [Good man! I'll never again follow the trend and call you a cuckolded tyrant.] [Huh? Hold on tight! "Bra... Your Majesty almost fell on me."] *Three years later, a rumor spread among the people of the five kingdoms. A majestic young princess appeared in the imperial palace of the Xia Kingdom. Tyrants allowed her to bully them, generals volunteered to be his heirs, and even the princes were beaten by her, yet no one blamed her. Initially, the common people of the five kingdoms treated this as a joke. Until they witnessed the princess painting a minister's left cheek in public. Far from being angry, the minister offered his right cheek to the princess as well. The emperor of Xia even offered a smile, "Who else do you want to paint? I'll capture them for you!" The common people of the five kingdoms responded: !!! The deafened prince responded: !!! Is the Xia Kingdom doomed?! Have the emperor and his courtiers gone mad?!

【满朝文武吃瓜+全员宠上天+欢乐向】她穿书了。幸运的是，她有系统加身，任务奖励非常香。倒霉的是，这TM是个整蛊系统，哪个皇帝愿意被当马骑，哪个朝臣愿意穿女装，哪个皇子愿意被打屁股。更不幸的是，她亲临反贼刺杀皇帝第一现场，即将被反贼丢出去当诱饵祭旗。元软一怒之下怒了一下。但穿成个婴儿能咋办，躺平把，还能赶早下一碗孟婆汤。【哎，还有一盏茶时间就要被丢出去当行刺的诱饵了！心累。】没想到皇帝居然躲开了必杀的一劫，随行将军勇武地将她救下来，同时还把她送给皇帝。元软激动眼：【好人啊！再也不跟风黑你是个绿帽暴君了。】【嗯？抱稳了啊！暴……陛下差点摔到我了】*三年后，五国民间流传了一则消息。夏国皇宫出现了一位威风八面的小公主。暴君任由她欺负，将军主动求当大马，皇子被她抽打了一顿非但没人责怪她。最初，五国老百姓们都把这事当笑话看。直到他们亲眼看见夏国小公主当街给某位大臣的左脸上画画，大臣非但不生气，还主动将右脸也递过去让小公主画画。夏国的皇帝甚至主动笑道，还想画谁！朕帮你抓来！五国老百姓：！！！听不到心声的皇子：！！！夏国是要灭亡了吗？！皇帝朝臣都疯了吗？！