有话和大家说 

I have something to say to everyone

Su Gua's life was filled with misfortune. From birth, he'd inexplicably trigger various bugs: clipping, ping drops, missing textures... His umbilical cord lost its collision volume when he was born, and no matter how hard he tried, it wouldn't cut, terrifying the entire delivery room. He went to school, and during break time, the entire school went into a trance with ping drops. He returned home, and upon opening the door, he was transported back seventy years, running head-on into a group of grandmas watching a movie. He took the elevated highway out of town, but a massive black curtain cut the road in half, encircling his hometown, with the words "[Map Loading]" blazoned across it. Later, Su Gua became a player and entered a strange game. As a result, the succubus girls lost their costume textures, the hangman's rope was long enough for a whole class of girls to jump rope, the "No Entry" sign at the hidden store entrance became "Free," and upon entering the game, he killed a chicken and entered the final stage, where the headless boss, bewildered, held a chicken's head. Sadako, who had just emerged from the TV with her upper body stuck in the washing machine, stuck her butt out: "Qiuqiu, you'd better kill me..." The system was furious: [Player Su Gua is making strange threats and breaking the rules of the world. He's truly rebellious! Now he's deciding on the crocodile skin outside the new human plasma. Hot, hot, hot, hot, hot, hot...] The players were shocked: "Your bug even freezes the system?" Su Gua slammed the table and stood up: "Whose bug is it? I cleared the level by my own ability!"

苏卦的一生充满了不幸。自降生起，他就会莫名其妙触发各种bug：穿模、掉ping、贴图丢失......他出生，脐带丢失了碰撞体积，怎么都剪不断，吓哭整个产房。他上学，课间操时全校师生集体掉ping抽搐。他回家，一开家门穿回七十年前，迎面撞上去大队看电影的太奶。他上高架出城，巨大的黑幕将公路拦腰截断，把家乡团团包围，上书几个大字：【地图加载中】。后来，苏卦成了玩家，来到了诡异游戏。于是，魅魔小姐姐们丢失了服装贴图，吊死鬼的绳子长得够一个班的女生跳绳，隐藏商店门口的“免进”卡成“免费”，刚进游戏杀了只鸡就进入最终阶段，boss无头鬼顶着鸡脑袋不知所措。刚从电视钻出来、上半身就卡在洗衣机里的贞子撅着屁股：“球球你还是把我杀了吧......”系统勃然大怒：【玩家苏卦恐吓诡异，破坏世界规则，真乃倒反天罡！现决定新人类等离子外的鳄鱼皮锟斤拷烫烫烫烫烫烫...】众玩家大惊：“你的bug连系统也卡？”苏卦拍案而起：“谁卡bug了？我凭本事通关的啊！”