Great work. Why the hiatus??

What's with the sudden world change???

Good at first, but not so much later. Remind me of The Lord Empire, MC got so horny that it gets fuking annoying. Such a great concept, ruined by MC lower head.

The cheat made the story uninteresting

I like it at first, when all the MC cares about are magic. Then little sister? Then dating Granger? After that what else ?? What a Magical Journey

Like it at first, but got dissapointed later. Just use one world as the main, use the others as an addition. I don't even know what do you want to write in the latter part.

Good starting point, but got bad later. I don't mind adding all kind of new stories to a fan fiction, but at least adhere to the original setting of the book. Why people always love adding mythology and God to all kind of fanfic?

Too Longwinded

Honestly, what kind of story do you want to write?? Adding everything possible is a bad idea, really bad idea