第1章 苟在后勤部

In the logistics department

"The first rule of the art of hiding: stay one kilometer away from Uzumaki Naruto!
The second essence of hiding: pretend to be dead immediately when you encounter the Akatsuki organization!
The third essence of the Way of Survival: Never admit that you know ninjutsu!
Kitano Hideichi strictly enforced the above principles, but the system rewards became more and more outrageous——
[Ninja Tool·Pearl Milk Tea Launcher] made Tsunade quit drinking;
[Summoning Jutsu: Delivery Boy] He was treated as the illegitimate son of Flying Thunder God by the Fourth Hokage;
Developed [Earth Style: Sofa Barrier Technique] and was asked by Orochimaru: "How to lie down gracefully?"
Finally, looking at himself begging for retirement on his knees and the people in the ninja world behind him shouting "Master Kitano", he sighed to the sky:
"I just want to be a salted fish, but you force me to become a god!"
Commenting on Itachi's plan to exterminate the clan as being too crude, he actually received an offer from the Akatsuki organization: "The Moon Eye Project needs your sharp tongue!"
Uchiha Madara: Do you want to dance too?
Me: No, I want to get off work. "

「苟道精髓第一条：远离漩涡鸣人一公里！
苟道精髓第二条：遇到晓组织立刻装死！
苟道精髓第三条：绝不承认自己会忍术！
北野秀一严格执行以上原则，却因系统奖励越来越离谱——
【忍具·珍珠奶茶发射器】让纲手戒了酒；
【通灵术·外卖小哥】被四代目当飞雷神私生子；
开发【土遁·沙发结界术】被大蛇丸求教：“如何优雅地躺平？”
最终，看着跪求退休的自己，和身后高呼“北野大人”的忍界众人，他仰天长叹：
“我只想当条咸鱼，你们却逼我成神！”」
点评鼬灭族计划太糙，竟收到晓组织offer：“月之眼计划需要您的毒舌！”
宇智波斑：你也想起舞吗？
我：不，我想下班。」